Archive for December, 2009

Ho, ho, ho! It’s that time of year again folks, and as we count down the days to Christmas, now is a great time to learn some funny Christmas songs. After all, ’tis the season to be jolly! Stretch your vocal chords, or stretch your fingers on the piano, and have the whole family laughing with these new, funny Christmas songs for children.

Doth Thou Know’st Ye Olde Lyrics?

The traditional carols have such beautiful melodies, but sometimes the lyrics to Christmas songs are hard to understand. After a “hither”, a “thou know’st”, and a “good league”, most adults start to lose the plot, so imagine how difficult it must be for children! To make the traditional Christmas songs more relevant for today’s kids, I decided it was time to write some new song lyrics.

So I set to work and wrote a collection of funny Christmas songs for children that preserves the original melodies of our favorite Christmas carols, but breathes completely new life into them. They’re Christmas songs like you’ve never heard them before! They’re wierd, wacky, and warped, but all in good fun! Here’s a sample:

Groove King Senseless
(To the tune of Good King Wenceslas)

Groove King senseless last looked out
On his fans all screaming.
Drove into a round-about,
Deep in his day dreaming.

Brightly shone the police light,
Though his fate was cruel.
When he stumbled out of sight,
Up went all the fu-u-el!

Turn the page and you will see
Why the news is selling
Vonda Shepherd, who is she?
What’s with all the yelling?

Says she jumped a giant fence
From a nearby mountain
For his love – it makes no sense
But she hit the fountain!

Bring me flesh, and bring me bones
Please don’t take forever.
How can I answer the phones?
‘Til she’s back together.

Here’s a left and there’s a right
Fixed with lots of good glue
Poor Groove King got such a fright
Do you think he’ll sue?

Funny Christmas songs are a great way to get everyone singing along and having a great time. The traditional Christmas carols have simple, yet powerful melodies that are so familiar to us all. But after hearing the same cryptic lyrics year after year, it’s no wonder some kids (and adults!) get bored with tradition. So why not try something new this year?

After all, holidays are a time for love and laughter, and what better way to bring families together than by sharing a joke in a Christmas song! Why not even have a go at writing your own funny words? The whole family could have a competition to see who can write the funniest lyrics. Surprise your friends and family this Christmas with some outrageous, warped, and funny Christmas songs!

Put a smile on your ‘dial’, with some funny Christmas songs that are sure to brighten up your holidays! For a chuckle, check out this cheeky site: Funny Christmas Songs For Children. Here you’ll find some great reviews of hilarious Christmas albums and MP3s available for download, plus more wacky lyrics. Start singing super silly seasonal songs so Santa won’t be the only jolly one this year!

For a funny musical interpretation of Good King Wenceslas, listen to “Groove King Wenceslas” on Audiojungle. This jazzy tune is available for download in MP3 format. Plus it’s royalty free so you can use it in any of your own projects. Explore the huge collection of Christmas tunes and themes at Audiojungle.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Troy_Johns

Are you a guitar beginner? Are you an experienced guitarist that’s just lost that motivation to play? Do you want some structure to your practising? Or maybe you just want to improve as a guitarist? Then this simple guide is for you. This guide contains 52 simple tips for you to try out so that you can:

Improve technique
Finger Ability
Theory knowledge
Motivation
Timing
Rhythm
Many More

Now please remember that these are just simple tips that you can do, and you will need to read into them further to boost your techniques. But this is the groundwork for this.

Motivation

1) Make a list of songs that you can already play – If you aren’t feeling that motivated about the guitar, then this tip can be extremely useful and give you a great sense of pride.
2) Make a list of songs that you would like to be able to play within the next; Week
3) Month
4) 6 Months
5) And Year
6) Make a list of what you would like to achieve by playing guitar? Job? Band? Degree? Songwriting? Just for fun?
7) Set yourself a target. Like a weekly song that you are going to learn.
Go to your local library and get a tabulature book of your favourite band to learn. This is free and it is also a timed target, because you have to return the book at a specific date.
9) Go to your local Guitar shop, pick up a guitar and play. Or just stay in the shop long enough to see some other cool dude play. It will Inspire.
10) Watch some Youtube videos of your favourite guitarists.
11) Listen to some songs of your favourite guitarists.
12) Write down why they are your favourite guitarsists and analyse their style, and how you can mimic this.
13) Go to see a local band in your area. It will make you feel good that there are guitarists out there that are doing it, who aren’t a bigtime band.

Finger Exercises

14) Practice finger exercises as often as possible. If you feel any pain or discomfort the stop immediately.
15) Try the bottle neck technique for longer stretch. Get old Pepsi bottle caps and place them between your fretting fingers whilst not playing guitar. i.e. Whilst watching the T.V.
16) Practice different variations of scales, alternating between fingers. Try to start with the pentatonic as it is the easiest and most widely used.
17) Try to learn a new Barre chord shape every week. This is not only a great test and workout for the fingers but its a great way to learn a new chord a week:-)
18) If you can afford one, buy a Gripmaster.
19) Learn Alternate picking
20) Learn Economy picking
21) Check Steve Vai’s workout (although its fucking long) There are some pretty good variations of this workout on the web which aren’t as long.

Theory

22) Learn the guitar notes along the top string, then move on to the other string.
23) Try to learn a new chord a week
24) Try to learn a new scale a week, until you have mastered them
25) Buy a chord dictionary. This will be your Bible.
26) Learn the five positions of the pentatonic, as this is the most used scale around and a lot of riffs/solos are based on this.
27) Analyse different guitar keys by using the Roman Numeral System.
28) Look at some of your favourite songs and work out what key they are in.
29) Experiment with unusual Time Signatures.
30) Experiment with unusual tunings.
31) Learn Suspended chords
32) Make chord progressions
33) Mess around with different variations of them
34) Go into a guitar shop and try a Left -handed guitar. This should give you a great feel for the guitar and the notes. It should also show you how far you’ve come with your normal hand.
35) Try writing a basic chord progression
36) Then try to add Time Signature
37) And Melody
38) Key
39) Rhythm
40) Arrangement
41) Lyrics
42) Record your song if you can and revisit it at a later date to see what you could add to it.

Miscellaneous

43) Buy a metronome.
44) start practising with it at different speeds.
45) If you can afford one, buy a drum machine, if not some free one’s can be found on the internet
46) Practice with different drum beats and at different tempo’s. This will greatly improve your time and your ear for music.
47) Again if you can afford it buy some backing tracks, if not visit here it has a few decent backing tracks.
48) Play with some slower tracks at first and build up to faster, more challenging songs.
49) Find another guitarist to jam with.
50) Try to start rehearsing with a band even if all you do is rehearse. This will improve your improvisation, timing and rhythm.
51) Record yourself playing every 1-3 months and see how much you’ve improved.
52) The most important tip ever! ENJOY YOURSELF!

So there it is. My 52 tips on Guitar Practice. These were just a basis to get you going and hopefully even if you do one or two of these a week your guitar playing will be improved.

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